When a family experiences a pregnancy or infant loss with siblings old enough to understand what is going on, it can be very difficult for them as well. When they are old enough to understand but not old enough to be able to cope through the feelings, it can be even more difficult. Love and support from parents and loved ones is extremely important through this process.
From our research and in speaking with nurses and others that have years of experience in this, here is a short list of what has been found most helpful:
You may need to do a little adjusting to this list, depending on their age but overall, something on this list will hopefully help an older sibling and we hope and pray it does.
Losing Abigail was not only heartbreaking for us but also for her big sister, Isabel. She had her hopes and dreams with her little sister and they were shattered. We noticed a change in her behavior the month after Abigail's birth and worked hard to help her through the pain. Children enjoy talking and for her, we found that talking about Abigail and making her a part of our life here, helped. So we talk about Abigail everyday. Isabel has an Abigail bear that was gifted to us at Abigail's memorial which she likes to sleep with. Abigail has a Christmas stocking that is hung on the mantel with ours. Even though, she still has difficult times, we have seen strides of improvement and healing in her. She loves her little sister and always will.
If there are other things that you have found helpful in the older sibling's healing process, please send us a message. We'd love to hear from you!
WAYS TO HELP SIBLINGS THROUGH PREGNANCY LOSS
Pregnancy and Infant Loss Support
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